2 Weeks Left...

Yup, that's right, folks. In less than two weeks time, Brian and I will be leaving the somewhat now chilly Australia (turns out they actually experience autumn here...) for the tropical beaches and misty mountains of Southeast Asia. I'll be turning in our 3-bedroom home and lovely housemates in Glebe in favor of strangers and a backpack. Hello, one change of clothes! 

Of course, while I'm undoubtedly excited to embark on the next leg of my worldly adventures, this goodbye is not going to be an easy one. Consequently, I've opted to say goodbye in the way I know best: by writing a somewhat romantic--perhaps overly dramatic--farewell letter. Enjoy:

To my dear Australia:

I feel a bit silly writing you this letter, particularly considering I may never receive any sort of response. But what can I say, mate? You've been good to me. You've spared me from sharks and crocs, from spindly red-back spiders and blue-bottled jellies. You've provided me with a perma-tan that I will cherish always, even when I begin to wrinkle at age 25. 

Without you, Natalie and I would have never met the Markellos family, who taught us that even just a little bit of Tassie beauty and simplicity can cure even this Silicon Valley girl's dependency on the internet. It was through you that I learned that collecting chicken eggs at six in the morning is almost better than a round of Mario Kart, and that sitting in front of a warm fire with a cup of tea while simultaneously snuggling up to two giant dogs is a totally underestimated method of de-frosting oneself. 

Had it not been for you, dear Aussie land, I would have never been to Apollo Bay, would have never been able to say: "I've driven the Great Ocean Road."

You gave us the Hicks family and their wonderful Blue Gables label wine. It was here that Natalie and I cooked our first Thanksgiving EVER--a mighty feat. 

Because of you, I ended up at a somewhat dodgy hostel on Bondi Beach, surrounded by some of the most odd and friendly faces I'm sure I'll ever encounter. You gave me Stenio, the ever sneaky Brazilian boy with the annoyingly beautiful blonde hair. Oh, and Laurence, the British guy who every day, without fail, asked me to put hot girls in his room. You gave me Roberto, who claimed he was thirty, although we all knew he was really forty-six. Australia, you have provided me with all the characters I'll ever need to write my first novel. 

I can't deny that I've grown very attached over these past 9 months. I'm not sure I want to leave Hereford House and my two housemates Lauren and Jen. And what will Winnie (the Pooh) bunny do without me?

I have this wonderful life over here with you. I can't say for certain that letting you go is the right thing. I do know, however, that there are a few things about you that I will not miss (and perhaps you should work to improve these things...):

1.  your sugary mayonnaise is not good
2. jorts went out of style like 15 years ago...you should probably tell your tweeny-bopper male demographic
3. your paper money is too colorful and therefore distracting. back home, we know how to make a person's dinero unappealing and cheap-looking
4. i still do not like your crocodiles. or sharks. 
5. your internet is very slow and your cell phone service terrible. i also don't understand this pay-per-gigabyte thing--it's odd, and i don't like it. 
6. people here are too friendly. i'm from Washington, D.C, so clearly friendly people irk me.
7. no one here says "shrimp on the barbee"...false advertising = one big no-no.

Honestly, though, I could only come up with 7 items to my "Cons" List.  You're pretty much perfect, for which I'm not sure I love or resent you.

Still, it's time for me to move on. Know that I will always remember you, and those memories will forever bring me happiness.

So yeah, I guess this is goodbye, dear Aussie land. May Kevin Rudd be defeated in the election for Prime Minister, and may your deadly creatures forever reign.

Until next time, friend. Ta.

Cheers,
Carlyn